As Alice gets older, I've been wondering when the questions about Maggie would start, when she would just stop thinking it normal that Maggie doesn't sit up like her, walk like her, eat like her, talk like her. Or like anyone else, for that matter.
Tonight, out of the blue, they started. We were all sitting around the table having dinner - and Maggie doing so well with her Sunday dinner baby food - when Alice spoke directly to Maggie across the table: "Talk, Maggie...Maggie, talk."
It completely shocked me, despite the wonderings. I started to cry and Paul covered for me, telling Alice that Maggie would talk soon, when she was ready, and that was the end of it. I thought maybe the food would come first, or even the sitting or walking because we're always carrying Maggie and often insisting, much to Alice's frustration and annoyance, that Alice walk. But to be sitting there, having a lovely dinner around the table, chatting loads between ourselves and for Alice to simply just want Maggie to join in. That's a reality kick killer, that one, and it's sticking with me this evening.
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I don't know what to write but just wanted to let you know that I have read this several times since you wrote it and it moved me to tears. I feel for you all. It is such a bittersweet thing that Alice's first wondering was about wanting Maggie to join in rather than frustration or puzzlement about a physical difference between them. I read your blog regularly and my heart goes out to you often. Your writing is honest and very emotive. Your pain and love for your family come through in equal measure. And even though I've never met you, I find myself liking you more and more. Wishing you all the best, and hope the sweet outweighs the bitter in the end.
ReplyDeleteStay as strong and groovy as you are kiddas.You're so tippety top line all of you.I wish I was intelligent and articulate enough to put it better XXX
ReplyDeleteHi Paul and Shannon, I have 4 year old twins because of complications at birth my little boy has Cerebral Palsy. I know how hard it is and feel everything you have written. I have tried to contact you by your email address but its unable to send. My twins were born on 02 Aug 07 and the birth was a nightmare which left my baby boy with Cerebral Palsy. I was wondering if you could contact me to chat further....Take care and stay strong Jo..
ReplyDeleteOh bless Alice - as Anonymous says - that's so bitter sweet - I can't type for tears. x
ReplyDeleteXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Helen
ReplyDeleteHello.....
ReplyDeleteI so relate to this right now...
I have twin daughters that are 28 months old. Olive has rett syndrome, a severe neurological disorder, she has been loosing skills since she was 12 months old.. she was diagnosed at 17 months old. I wonder every day how this will shape her sister Tilda & when she will start to realise her sister is different........ you are not alone in this place....
Lots of love...
Janie x